Authentic Voices

The other night with a pair of dear friends, one of those conversations started, the kind that pokes at the basic question of life and being.

Of course we did not come to a definitive conclusion about much, but the whole topic did strike a chord within me and brought me here to write.

In particular, we talked about the recent human rights struggle that the homosexual population is battling. In relation to their movement, we recognized how over time, there have been many similar battles but just in different forms.

For example, we talked about the civil rights movement and the fight for equality for African American folks. We talked about the friction of religion and how that has colored our world history.

We questioned whether or not anything has really changed at all with our species. Have we really evolved like they say or are we just humans becoming ourselves in a different era with different challenges? Although we are in a different time, we wondered if the challenges we face are really all that different.

We then pondered, if and when the homosexual crowd gets the equality they deserve, what personal battle will be on deck that we might not even be aware of? I'm not sure. But it's all really interesting to think about, and I've come to the momentary conclusion that these struggles have a lot to do with people finding their authentic voice and empowering themselves to use it.

This idea is emphasized by one of my favorite writers, Shaun McNiff. In his book, Trust the process: An artist's guide to letting go, he notes how one expression can be the stimulus for another creation/expression.

He says, "one thing is always growing from another" and that the source of this growth is life (p. 164). He says the reason why we paint from nature or write about our life experiences is because we are moved by life and all its events, people, problems, memories, scenes, patterns, gestures and creations of others or any other things, really.

He adds, "Creation is constantly playing different variations on themes and restating basic truths. The more we work at originality, the more we return to the same fundamentals which are renewed in each historical period by those who express them in appealing and striking ways" (p.165).

He goes on to say "Original statements keep returning to origins but in a style that is authentic to the person making the expression. The source never can be copied because it doesn't exist anywhere in a fixed form. It can only be interpreted" (p. 165).

These words makes me realize that what is happening with the gay community right now is not totally unique or original but is yet another expression of people being people.

In this light, suddenly life seems simple to me. What every culture and people have needed throughout time has been a space and some encouragement for authentic and sincere expression.

These issues and challenges are not original or new, and although McNiff writes in relation to creating art, I think his point speaks well to life in general; "If we liberate our personal and often idiosyncratic styles, we will create with individuality and vitality" (p. 165).

In other words, if we can all find our authentic voices and use them, we will learn how to appreciate and be inspired by other forms of expression and being. And as we accept ourselves and others, we may finally thrive as a people.

Inspiring People: Greta McLain

Today I woke up and saw this super fresh wedding announcement and it was so cool that I had to come here and post about it. It is two-sided, I have shared the front side.

My friend and sweet local artist, Greta is getting married on the same day as me.

FACT: If I was not me but a guest invited to both of our weddings, without a doubt, I would attend Greta's celebration in a HEARTBEAT.

Why? Well, for one because her invites are way cooler, and well, I know the diva, and it is going to be a grand party--truly a wedding of champions.

They are doing a processional style wedding that will take place over a weekend in Mpls. that can be reached by bike or the metro (truly green/sustainable) and they have invited everyone they know and are doing it potluck-style! Talk about a true and wonderful celebration of love and marriage while being surrounded by their whole community.

After reflecting on our wedding choices I have one regret--that we chose a venue that could not contain our entire community. How cool would it be to have all of the people in your life (who want to be there) show up at your ceremony for a big party? In our case we have many friends who we were not able to invite to our wedding because the space was limited--sad deal, but we can only hope they understand.

Obviously money was a factor for us too, but people like Greta remind me that if there is a will, there is a way. We often stop ourselves and let things like money or whatever our excuse is--hold us back from having what we want but a little creative thinking can go a long way.

If I had to do it all over again we would have done something similar to Greta's wedding of champions. We would have gone with our original plan to have a small wedding (10 people) and then follow it up with a big bash in the park--where everyone could be invited and roam in the woods, play volleyball and swim.

But I did not come on here to talk lost pipedreams and moan about our wedding (I already do plenty of that), I came on here to thank inspiring people like Greta for doing it big with the resources they have. Now that's what I call sustainability.

Which leads me to my last point before I get going here--art/creativity + sustainablity = casamiento perfecto. I think why I am drawn to the sustainability movement is definitely connected to environmental concerns but I am also attracted to it because it causes us to change the way we typically think about the world and become creative. The more humans tap into their own creativity the more diverse and rich the world becomes and the more sustainable it is for everyone.

In this case, I feel like Greta, a local, community artist who just naturally created a green wedding truly embodies the unspoken union between creativity and sustainability. Awesome and inspiring, that's all I have to say.

Finding myself going back to the drawing board

Use it or lose it has never had more meaning in my life than right now.

Trying to get back to the gym and lifting weights has been a struggle, and its funny to realize that after all of these years I still can only lift the bar. What happened to my progressive side?

Now I am setting the intention to be able to add some weight to the bar and keep it there. Baby steps. Means I will have to hit the gym...tomorrow. Riiiiiight. No really, in all seriousness, I will.

Additionally, being back on board the creative train makes me realize how angry my inner artist has been for holing her up all these years. While I was never someone dedicated to art on an intentional basis, I had my run with it in elementary school through high school. I took a few classes in college, but my artistic endeavors were limited to crafting and beading and unfortunately my beading took a huge plunge once I went away to college. Sad, but true.

Well now that I am "doing art" again on a daily basis I am enjoying drawing again, even though I am not necessarily the most accurate of drawers. Check out my little self-portrait of my user pic. I think I need to add some more hair to make my face look less large, but I might just have a big head. I am pretty sure the latter is more than likely the case...which means perhaps my drawing is more accurate than I give credit :)

Anyway, I bought some amazing colored pencils so I was happy to try them out this morning on my first page of my "visual journal" that I am making for one of my graduate studies courses. This journal is supposed to visually tell my story so naturally my first page that describes me provides a visual representation of myself.

I tried to write a poem that I was going to put around the picture, but this morning my inner poet was nowhere to be found so I'll have to postpone it for another day.

Until I write my own words about myself here are some quotes about identity--a theme I always find myself coming back to throughout my life and a theme that has resurfaced through the creative process.

We will discover the nature of our particular genius when we stop trying to conform to our own or to other people's models, learn to be ourselves, and allow our natural channel to open. - Shakti Gawain

Since you are like no other being ever created since the beginning of time, you are incomparable. - Brenda Ueland

There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any medium and will be lost. - Martha Graham

Trust the Process

This post is about trusting the process. One of those sayings that I love and hate at the same time.

The particular process I am talking about refers to my research project (although "the process" also applies to life as a whole).

Research, in particular, has been quite a pain so far. This is an understatement. Ask my classmates. So far, not a lot of joy has come out of "the process" with this course. I'm sorry to report this news, but that's my truth at the moment.

This upcoming semester is supposed to be my last semester in research. (Note I say supposed to be...I'm crossing my fingers). By the end of May according to the syllabus, I should be presenting my work.

Sitting in my kitchen right now, buried under an array of books and papers and the clutter of my mind, I am feeling smaller and smaller, like my voice is getting weaker through this "process."

At the same time, I am feeling something stronger, just at the surface of something. What this feeling is must be hope or perhaps a twitch of some sort. If I'm lucky it means I'm on the verge of a breakthrough. If I'm not lucky, it could be closer to something like a breakdown. I'm not sure. I'm just waiting.

I don't have much time to elaborate on what I'm going through, but I'd like to put some quotes up from Shaun McNiff that are all I have to hold onto at this point. In my journey so far he is the only person who seems to make me feel a little better about the feeling of stuckness I have regarding research and what research is all about. These quotes come from his book, Trust the process: An artist's guide to letting go.

"A person's license to create is irrevocable, and it opens to every corner of daily life. But it is always hard to see that doubt, fear, and indirectness are eternal aspects of the creative path" (p. 1).

"There have been so many times when I have given up, only to go at it again the next day, or the next year, and over the full course of life all of the moments appear so purposeful or even necessary" (p. 9).

"If we are able to stay with a situation, it will carry us to a new place" (p. 22).

"Anything truly novel and significant comes through unwatched, unintended, daimonically" (p.33).

The book is full of these sorts of gems, but I do not have time nor is it legal to paste them all down for you. So borrow the book from me or buy it if you are needing some words of encouragement through your creative process--your life, is what I'd call it.

On a side note: I will say, while I have not been personally touched by my Ah ha! moment in the realm of research, some other synchronicities have been playing themselves out in life, and there may be opportunities there for creation and a potential "side business." If I am lucky, it could be bigger than a side business. However, until I finish my research work for my M.A. I will not be putting too much time into this dream of mine.

Which leaves me to my last quote that I just saw on my tea bag:

"Our patience will achieve more than our force."

Making jewelry from nature

So I dedicate this blog post to my dear friend Angela from my Holistic Health Studies program. She is always modeling the latest artsy pieces of jewelry and many of her collection is inspired by up north and nature in general. She is quite the artist herself and one day I hope I could maybe share a link to some of her stuff with you.

The first thing I want to share is a bracelet that I will forever admire which Angela wore in the beginning of program (last fall) a lot. Yeah I am a creeper a little, but I notice these kinds of things. This one is of course more expensive than another one you could prolly find from a cheaper place but that is because it is an artist's work, and his name is Michael Michaud.

Its a bracelet that looks like bark from a birch tree. Talk about hot! Someday maybe you will see me sporting one of these. It depends if my bf reads my blog. haha, JK!


The second item on the agenda was a simple project that took me about 5 minutes. This necklace was inspired by a necklace Angela has as well. I know you're prolly thinking why don't you just marry Angela if you like her so much, and quite frankly that is a good question. But that is not the point of my posting. So back to the story-- I saw this necklace on her in class this past Monday and I recognized that I have many rocks from Hawaii that have been sitting around taking up space, and they have been a really special symbol and reminder for me of some significant life experiences that I cherish. I had been carrying this particular rock around with me in my "portable oasis" (which I can talk about at a later date), but I decided I wanted to make it into a necklace I could wear (modeled after Angela's) to remind myself more obviously of everything I learned in HI. All you need for this project is:

- Modge Podge
- A flatter rock (hopefully that has meaning to you)
- Some malleable metal
- Coil clasp parts
- Black cord
- Pliers

1) Take the metal and bend in half in the shape of a "U"
2) With this "U" shape, make sure to use the half circle end of the metal to act as the sort of eyepin circle that will connect the rock to the leather (see pic).
3) Tie or wrap the metal around the rock in whatever way you please. (the pic is pretty self-explanatory I hope).
4) Add modge podge with a paintbrush or your finger over the metal part that is holding the rock to secure it in place.
5) String the rock onto the leather cord of your preferred length.
6) Dip the ends of the leather cord into modge podge and then place the coil clasps over the gluey ends.
7) Using the pliers, clamp down the coil (like a crimp bead) and you have yourself a new necklace that brings nature and meaning into your life!

Check it out:


K, to be honest, I am very very tired (and sick--you can probably tell from my picture)so unfortunately my blogging ends here for now, but hopefully I can come back on soon and update my other two blogs considering I am back in school with plenty more material to share!

Have a nice relaxing weekend and I hope you have a minute to enjoy nature or art or maybe both together!

Fun gift/Craft Idea Warhol-esque Pet Art

Above is my friend Baxter, the cockerspaniel son of my friends, Jacci and Karen. This project was their Christmas present from Jay and me this year.

Borrowed this cute idea from my friend Katie. She made a great one of her dog, Howard. Basically all you need for this project is a good photo of your dog and then a photo editing program (the one that goes with your camera). Play with the photo by increasing the contrast and highlighting different colors. Do this for four or six or as many photos/colors you want to use. Then go to Snapfish.com and upload the altered photos to a photo album. Here you can make calendars, coffee mugs, or whatever your little heart desires. In this crafting project you will want to select the collage format. Choose the pictures you want to use (in this case I had 6 photos selected that I edited beforehand), and then place your order! It literally took a day to process my order and print at the site I selected---I picked mine up at Staples. Last grab yourself a coupon to Michaels and get yourself a nice frame :)

Artsy, creative, affordable, thoughtful, and fun! You could do this with family members. I am thinking for the parentals I will do one of our family come Mother's or Father's day.

"Taking Time for Beauty"

Forward from email:

A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that thousands of people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.

Three minutes went by and a middle aged man noticed there was musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule.

A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the till and without stopping continued to walk.

A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again. Clearly he was late for work.

The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy. His mother tagged him along, hurried but the kid stopped to look at the violinist.
Finally the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on.

In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace. He collected $32. When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.

No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the top musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written,with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars.

Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theater in Boston and the seats average $100.

This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station
was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and priorities of people. The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour: Do we perceive beauty?

Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?

One of the possible conclusions from this experience could be: If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world playing the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?

-------------

Here is the real article: Pearls Before Breakfast

This article takes me back to my college days and it sort of brings tears to my eyes. For one, I listened to him playing and it was so beautiful. For two, it makes me so sad to see the way that we have trained ourselves to react in that setting. The passages from the article that especially hit close to home were the following:

What is this life if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare.

-- from "Leisure," by W.H. Davies

Let's say Kant is right. Let's accept that we can't look at what happened on January 12 and make any judgment whatever about people's sophistication or their ability to appreciate beauty. But what about their ability to appreciate life?

We're busy. Americans have been busy, as a people, since at least 1831, when a young French sociologist named Alexis de Tocqueville visited the States and found himself impressed, bemused and slightly dismayed at the degree to which people were driven, to the exclusion of everything else, by hard work and the accumulation of wealth.

Not much has changed. Pop in a DVD of "Koyaanisqatsi," the wordless, darkly brilliant, avant-garde 1982 film about the frenetic speed of modern life. Backed by the minimalist music of Philip Glass, director Godfrey Reggio takes film clips of Americans going about their daily business, but speeds them up until they resemble assembly-line machines, robots marching lockstep to nowhere. Now look at the video from L'Enfant Plaza, in fast-forward. The Philip Glass soundtrack fits it perfectly.

"Koyaanisqatsi" is a Hopi word. It means "life out of balance."

In his 2003 book, Timeless Beauty: In the Arts and Everyday Life, British author John Lane writes about the loss of the appreciation for beauty in the modern world. The experiment at L'Enfant Plaza may be symptomatic of that, he said -- not because people didn't have the capacity to understand beauty, but because it was irrelevant to them.

"This is about having the wrong priorities," Lane said.

If we can't take the time out of our lives to stay a moment and listen to one of the best musicians on Earth play some of the best music ever written; if the surge of modern life so overpowers us that we are deaf and blind to something like that -- then what else are we missing?

That's what the Welsh poet W.H. Davies meant in 1911 when he published those two lines that begin this section. They made him famous. The thought was simple, even primitive, but somehow no one had put it quite that way before.

Of course, Davies had an advantage -- an advantage of perception. He wasn't a tradesman or a laborer or a bureaucrat or a consultant or a policy analyst or a labor lawyer or a program manager. He was a hobo.

----------

Food for thought...

I Super Heart Half Price Books and Maya Angelou

Lately I haven't really been buying books. I have been a big fan of the library because it is free and I am not creating additional waste (in producing another book to sit on my shelf). However, I must say I have been missing not having my books I have read lately. The last book I actually purchased was Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson, but I ended up donating it to the library afterwards to pay back for all of my borrowing. I do wish I could contribute to the authors in some other way than purchasing their work. I'll have to look into that...

Anyway, I still have no shame in buying used books! Yesterday I purchased 4 books (two of which are hardcover) for $7. I found: Maya Angelou's Even the Stars Look Lonesome, Jamaica Kincaid's Lucy, Barbara Kingsolver's The Bean Trees, and Mitch Albom's The Five People You Meet in Heaven. Needless to say I am ecstatic, and Jay was pretty bummed to see that I was paying more attention to my new finds than him. He finally tore my eyes away from Maya Angelou's book to watch Four Christmases, which we both decided was not really good, but fine enough in the spirit of the holidays.

Anyway, I wanted to write a bit about Maya's book, since this is one of the first books I have ever read by her (yes I already finished it!) I have listened to her on tape before, but not actually read many of her works. This book is a continuation of a reflection from her set of essays called, Wouldn't Take Nothing for My Journey Now, and it is divided into short chapters/reflections on her life experiences. I would like to highlight some quotes that personally stuck out for me from her work.



An African proverb: "The ax forgets. The tree remembers" (17).

"Another proverb that provided inspiration for a Nigerian cloth design is 'If you do not appreciate the things you have, other people will treat them with contempt'" (69).

I love this final passage to her "Art in Africa" chapter, it really connects to the recent conversations I have been having in class about art and community as well as the recent development of a women's creative circle among some of my lady friends from college and myself:

Whether or not the arrangement of lines and colors has remembered roots
in ancient maxims, there is a great aesthetic sense that animates the crafts of
painting, weaving, dyeing cloth, and pot-making. Women, using ordinary clay
found in riverbeds and employing their hands as paintbrushes, produce a
powerful vehicle for visual pleasure. Their crafts are also public statements of
their personal creeds.

The simple materials are forged into plastic designs that will be as temporary
as the length of time between rainfalls, and with no lasting staying power
against the insistent sun. These artists, however do not seem to need promises
of longevity, nor do they exhibit a craving for notice out of the ordinary. In
fact, one of the most notable characteristics of house painting among West
African women is the camaraderie found among women sharing the creation of
design. Family members and those attached by friendship often join together in
the industry of decoration. When they do, it is agreed that the principal owner
will contribute the major design, but it is also expected that every woman will
bring something of her own to add to the overall effect.

Thus art made by all can be enjoyed by all. The African saying is proved true:
Sea never dry.(Even the Stars Look Lonesome, 70).


"If it is true that a chain is only as strong as its weakest link, isn't it also true a society is only as healthy as its sickest citizen and only as wealthy as its most deprived?" (108)

"Great art belongs to all people, all the time--indeed it is made for the people by the people" (130).

"We need art to live fully and to grow healthy. Without it we are dry husks drifting aimlessly on every ill wind, our futures are without promise and our present without grace" (133).

From her last chapter which shares the same title as the book, I felt a special message that needs to be written down more fully to absorb the context of her wisdom. Maya describes a person she knew who was leading a life similar to that of the Prodigal Son. Here are the last 5 paragraphs of her book:

In the biblical story, the prodigal son risked and for a time lost everything he
had because of an uncontrollable hunger for company. First, he asked for and
received his inheritance, not caring that his father, from whom he would
normally inherit, was still alive; not considering that by demanding his
portion, he might be endangering the family's financial position. The parable
relates that after he took his fortune, he went off into a far country and there
he found company. Wasteful living conquered his loneliness and riotous
companions conquered his restlessness. For a while he was fulfilled, but he lost
favor in the eyes of his friends. As his money began to disappear he began to
lip down the steep road to social oblivion.

His condition became so reduced that he began to have to feed the hogs. Then
it further worsened until he began to eat with the hogs. It is never lonesome in
Babylon. Of course, one needs to examine who--or in the prodigal son's case,
what--he has for company.

Many people remind me of the journey of the prodigal son. Many believe that
they need company at any cost, and certainly if a thing is desired at any
cost, it will be obtained at all costs.

We need to remember and to teach our children that solitude can be a much-to-be- desired condition. Not only is it acceptable to be alone, at times it is
positively to be wished for.

It is in the interludes between being in company that we talk to ourselves. In
the silence we listen to ourselves. Then we ask questions of ourselves. We
describe ourselves to ourselves, and in the quietude we may even hear the voice
of God. (144-145).


Whether or not you are a believer of God, I feel that the message in her "Even the Stars Look Lonesome" chapter really empowers us to take some time to be alone with ourselves. Only during this time can we truly make room for self-reflection and self-creation.

On all of those notes, have an artful day and make sure to take time this weekend to be alone with the stars.

Information System Overload

This photo, "Brain Explosion" was drawn by artist, Amanda Abella.

I like this picture because it really captures how I feel right now about life. When I think of information systems or about the brain I think about it very mechanically and almost robotic. When I hear the words "system overload," I think about technology and computers. One wouldn't generally think about flowers really. However, in this moment I do. I feel that a huge expansion is occurring in my brain/mind and it feels like an explosion, but I feel more like Amanda's picture. It is an expansion/transformation that is bigger than me, and greater in depth than I can understand right now, but I can feel it and it is not an explosion that is destructive but more so it is creative.

Now if you haven't been following my blog you might not have noticed I am going to school for Holistic Health Studies right now. This moving into graduate school is contributing greatly to this shift in mindset. For two years my brain has been dormant and suddenly it is being electrocuted with new ways of thinking, new reading materials, and creative research projects. While I am incredibly stoked and the happiest I have ever felt in my life right now, it does bring about some great personal challenges that I am going to have to face. One of those challenges is handling this shift in perspective and also handling the wonderful information I do receive and making sure it creates and gives off something more than just an explosion.

Also, I might add that if time allows, I have been considering creating another blog to specifically follow my journey in my Master's Program because I can already feel that it is going to be full of surprises and growth and I constantly want to talk about it. I'll keep you posted on its potential birthdate. I already started another blog called Go Green Machine. I created this one specifically because I am trying to be a little more organized in my thoughts and in my sharing with you all and I have great interest in conservation and the environment and sustainability as well.

I'd love to stay and write more about this "explosion/expansion" as my mind is teeming with information just waiting to be unpacked, but I have to get in the shower and begin addressing the piles of research projects and homework that have approaching deadlines.

Cheers to Friday and homework and BALANCE! May we all lead a balanced day and life!